FAT does not stand for Fabulous and Thick

I wrote this great summary of my amazing summer and promptly sent it off to my friend (www.ilovepauljack.com) without filing a copy away for myself. Basically, I am turning 35 in two weeks (September 25th) and I have started to get to know myself in ways that I never tried in the past. I am also walking down a path of healing from childhood, teenage, and young adult wounds. I make mistakes, but I am not one. My confession today is that I am fat. For those of you who see me on a daily, weekly, monthly basis, this is not breaking news to anyone but me. Obviously I have world class compartmentalization skills - I mean mad skills! So let's talk about fat, because at one time I was 4'11" and 100 pounds and complaining about my love handles, if you can image! Nope, I am dead serious about this. My BMI is such that I am considered a walking time bomb. I am a NFL offensive line tackle. I am a Biggest Loser Contestant. Yes, sports fans - I am FAT. So the first step is admitting you have a problem and here are mine:

1. I am fat
2. I do not like to eat breakfast and consider coffee a food group
3. I eat chocolate when I am stressed out
4. Sometimes I go so long without eating that just before I begin throwing up from hunger, I stand in my pantry and eat whatever is in a snack size bag that I can open.
5. I am the child of alcoholic parents and never learned moderation

Ok, step one complete, step two - come up with a plan. My current plans are:

1. Give Up Caffeine - Failed ( and really what the hell was I thinking)
2. Breakfast every morning, and yes a protein shake counts
3. Water, Water, Water
4. Eat more fruits and vegetables, including the kiwi that has sat on your desk for two days
5. Get up and walk the dogs in the morning - You know this only happened a couple of times
6. Work out with a personal trainer that you like, feel motivated by, and who is reasonably priced.

So I met Liz today and this is a long story, but to cut to the chase, I am getting four free sessions with her. She is beautiful and funny and has a rockin' body that I would die to have. She does 2 or 3 people group sessions that are affordable. I think she might be the answer to my exercise prayers. Granted, I have to do something on the days that I do not see her and this DEMO gala is not helping my consistency. But to motivate me, I have a beautiful suit that I bought specifically for this event and cannot currently wear it. Which sucks! And yes, it fit when I bought it if that tells you where my life has gone over the past 6 months. So this is my honest admission for the day and I am off to the treadmill.